Blowing Bubbles...

Yay.. it's Wednesday and Ben is home today... and to make it even better he'll be home at lunch time... I cant stop watching that damn clock!!!
I need to explain to people how hard it is to get out and about with twins sometimes... I have to pack double everything you would normally pack for one, then I have to make double the bottles and then get the two sometimes 3 bags I need out to the car then one by one take the babies out to the car while making sure I havent forgotten anything.... then theres the getting ready bit, up fed wiped over and all that.. its so friggin hard and if I have to be somewhere early then I also have to have Mj and Cj ready aswell and they are NOT morning people ( I have no idea who they got that from :P) so this am I did all that.... get in the car to go to find both my babies are blowing bubbles out their noses........ so all my efforts were wasted because Im not that mum that will take sick babies to creche or child care.... so I dropped Mj and CJ at school and turned around to come home...... there goes my work out for today and I need to do it!! Ive become a bit of a gym junkie, mostly because I can kick it with the super fit now and give ppl a run for their money..... also I need the stress release... and Ive seen a difference abit of determination can get you. Im really happy with how Im starting to look, especially after having twins. I cant wait to get back on the netball court...
I have had 3 really bad nights in a row, every 1- 2 hours Ive been up, Im a mess at the moment and really look like shit. I need sleep to function, I cant without sleep. Im useless, cranky and well best stay away from me coz Ill just take my lack of sleep out on you!! Im not sure what the issue is but on the first night callum and rori were both spewing and well that was fun!
At least ben is home to do it now.. im taking a much needed time out....
He hasnt had his 2nd int yet.... i swear BHP are useless... its not hard to organise a video conferance.. but for gemco it is! Ben has to wait another 2 wks now to do it because the person who needs to do it isnt available now for another 2wks! My dream of leaving here soon is fading away fast..... I still think he will get it but I think its going to take time.. the whole recruitment process. Still I have everything crossed.
Ive been thinking alot lately about how sincere some people are, i always seem to attract friends that really think bragging and having the best of everything is going to make them more appealing.... maybe to cash converters but not to me! I then ask myself am i jealous? or is it just annoying... i came to the conclusion its just annoying because I have got alot of awesome stuff, more than the people who brag so I dont really think i can be jealous. Im jealous though, of wifes who have their husbands home every night... that makes me jealous. Familys that are together at the dinner table everynight. Dads helping their kids with their homework every night... God i cant wait to have that back, esp when ben is better at helping mj with her maths than I am!!
Im not jealous of people who pretend to be something they are not because they dont have the strength or courage to change their own lives... i have afew friends like that.
Anyhow,,, twins.. today are having a good day... rori is learning to "dance" she just bounces up and down when music is on, i have been able to put a teeny tiny pony tail in her hair at the top, kind of point less but looks cute!! brodie is getting around pretty well now, i put him down come back later to find him somewhere else.. they seem to both like pulling the dvds out the dvd stand.....
Im really in a weird place today, ive had a really hard 3 days, probably the lowest. All mums have that moment but when is enough enough? I dont think I have one person that fully understands the life I have.. i dont really understand why I have this life. Why its frustrating to see people who if they choose can have a good life but they choose to make it harder.
I think Im just sleep deprived. Really rambling here... I know I need a good BIG sleep. Ive never looked worse.
So im going to leave you here after my incoherant rant and rave.... dont judge me.. im not right today.
much love
em
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